For the first time in the history of this blog, a prediction that I made actually came to fruition.
Three and a half months ago, in my last blog post, I wondered how my new vaccinated status would affect my gaming. Would my newfound ability to leave the house again drive me away from digital worlds into the real one?
The answer was very much yes. I put probably 20 more hours into Persona 5. My D&D group finished up it's campaign in a couple of sessions. My Among Us group fell apart as we all returned to normal life.
But Blaugust actually shows up at an opportune time. I'm actually sitting at my PC again due to a combination of extreme summer heat and Canadian wildfires turning our air into poison. Out of the frying pan and into the fire if you will.
But the 'digital break' has been good for me and I'm ready to reengage with the Blaugust community. I'm excited to be back again and judging from the explosion of my RSS feeds so are all of you.
A minor programming change.
I've dropped the "Internet" from "Everwake's Internet Adventures". Quarantine really blurred the lines between my online and offline personas. Like all of us, my social life was essentially moved online for the past year and a half.
But reconciling the "online" and "offline" sides of my personalities was genuinely tough for me.
I think it was Among Us that highlighted it for me. I played with a rotating group of 8-14 real life friends in a game that's about lying to and murdering people. Modulating my aggressive competitiveness with not wanting everyone I know to hate me was difficult. I was not always successful at it.
But ultimately, it was fine. I play to win, but I do play fair. I'm not and there weren't really any hurt feelings out of it. I have the same relationship I had with everyone before the pandemic.
I've always felt I had to hide that part of my personality away; that it wasn't fit for public consumption. This was true even back in school. I played in competitive baseball leagues. My high school team was a non-competitive rural school playing other small, rural schools. My friend's really never saw the competitive part of this personality. There was never a "need" for this, it just happened that way. It became a habit.
As Bilbo said to Gandalf: "I feel thin, sort of stretched, like butter scraped over too much bread."
Of course I've not experience anything that anybody else hasn't. We all don different masks for different contexts in our lives. But during the pandemic I really began thinking about these different but disparate parts of my personality. What bits are the "real" me? And if I merge the three together, what is the ultimate result?
I don't think I want to juggle three different me's anymore. And so for the past couple of months I've been approaching my life in a bit of a different way. For this blog that means erasing the boundary between the digital and the organic. More hiking photos, more stories of my personal life, and likely a different change in tone. But, it's still a gaming blog at heart, ostensibly an MMO one at that.
|Air Quality Index - Red is bad.|
Although if the world keeps catching on fire we might not see much difference in the content of this blog at all.