Friday, December 13, 2019

reEverquesting II Part 5 - Family Letters

This is Part 5 of my playthrough of Everquest II. I encourage you to read the previous entries before this one: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Swallowing every last bit of pride that I have is difficult. But since I've ran out of food and money it's the only thing I have to be swallowing. My sister is a wizard. An accomplished one. Has about 15 years of experience and has been party to some of the most famous heroic tales the bards sing.

She's also kind of a bitch.

I "borrow" some pen and paper and postage and money and shoes from a local ratonga and write my letter.



Dearest Falcona,

My ventures to the Isle of Refuge went, as one would expect, exceeding well. I now find myself in the heart of Freeport, hobnobbing around the rich and famous of Norrath. With my surely imminent arrival to the tippy-topps of Freeportian society, it is only customary that I secure the prestige of my future station. I've begun my work for the Academy of Arcane Science of course. One of the most promising students they've yet seen I'm assured. (While I'm not technically enrolled I am working for one of the researchers, the structures of education have never fit me as you well know. I specifically prefer it this way.) For my patron, I've catalogued some of the most ferocious and indomitable creatures found on the continent. And yet, despite my work, my once benefactor has reneged on his payment, calling my sketches "amateurish" and "inscrutable". I loathe to impose upon my dearest sister. But with all of your well-earned success as a wizard of the past 15 years, it is my hope that you may have some resources to help correct a frightful wrong done to your sister. 

I have located a suitable bit of lodging in the appropriate section of our humble town. It is my sincere hope that you will provide me with 5,000 platinum pieces to begin establishing our family's deserved outpost here in the city of Freeport. I thank you in advance for your most helpful contribution.

Sincerely,

Aurella



The efficiency of the Overlord's mail carriers is quite impressive. I received a return missive in but an hour.



Dear Aurella,

Good to see you made it out alive. Get out of Freeport, the place is a dump. Here's 50 plat.

-Suck it,




Bitch.

Fine, whatever. 50 plat is nothing to her. I know she has a hundred times that, but that makes me borderline rich to the various peasants walking around Freeport. 

The money will be a meal and a night's rest. Maybe I'll be a bit less cranky in the morning. Apartment hunting will have to wait for a little while longer. I have actually lined up another job, probably a bit more suited to my skillset. While at the Academy, another researcher overheard while I was getting dressed down for my lack of natural artistic abilities. She directed me to a Zaddar Sullissia in the Freeport graveyard. Now that sounds like work more suited to a budding Necromancer!

Thursday, December 12, 2019

rEverquesting II: Part 4 - The Freeport Sewers

This is Part 4 of my playthrough of Everquest II. I encourage you to read the previous entries before this one: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 

I got a job.

Obviously I got a job. I'm a very talented necromancer. Even in the capital of evil that sort of talent doesn't just walk by. And the Academy of Arcane Science is where I was walking by when I saw the help wanted poster.

Nerd alert.

So now I'm a researcher. Cataloging the creatures of ... the Freeport Sewers.

Frick.

Whatever. It's fine. Housing in this city is out of hand. Oh sure they give you a studio apartment for free. But that has to come with a caveat. It's an evil city, they're not just giving away free housing. I assume the first night you spend in that apartment and they take your spleen.

I'm fond of my spleen.

So we will figure out my own path. And I hope it's a quick path because it's been 72 hours since I've slept. I'm on my eighth can of Red Bull and I'm starting to see candy canes.



And purple shining lights.


I really need to lay down.

Whatever. I have my handy dandy notebook and pen. I need to observe some select creatures and give them a little sketch. Finally, six years of art school is paying off.

First off is a ravenous cube:


Okay, well he's just a ... cube. Sort of like Jell-o? Just sort of wiggling about in the muck. Cubing. Seems to do nothing but cube about, living its life. I think we can draw this one easily enough.

Nailed it. Okay what else is on the list?A sewage rat. Gross, but doable.


Alrighty, just doodle up a little drawing here and ...:


Got it. Easiest money of my life. What now? A Darkblade fury. Is a sentient being a creature? I think I'm being asked to catalog a dude. Not sure if he's really a part of the fauna here but okay. I've killed loads of these guys, and the researcher was clear they needed to be alive when I cataloged them. So let's see if I missed any during my first go around.


And here's one now. In such a lovely pose. Its very hard to sketch while be attacked but that's why I get paid the not-so-big-bucks.


There we go. I even broke out the colored pencils for that one. That researcher is going to shit bricks when he sees this level of detail. I feel like I really got the gist of her scowl in this one. And the pointiness of her tin sword.

Scrawled on my instructions, it says the next creatures of note belong in The Serpent Sewer. Charming name. I follow the provided map and find my quarry. It's all a bit intimidating though. I consider the first snake in front of me and it looks mean. Maybe a little too mean. Maybe we are best off if we leave these creatures uncatalogued for now.

So, stuck once again. Mostly broke, mostly homeless, and seeing literal visions of sugar plum fairies in my head, I'm resorted to doing the unthinkable. I need to ask for help. From my goodie-two-shoes, thinks-shes-better-than-me, vomits-sparkles-and-butterflies, dads-always-telling-me-why-can't-I-be-more-like-my sister.

Kill me.

Tuesday, December 10, 2019

rEverquesting II: Part Three - Isle of Refuge Tidy Up, Freeport, and the Freeport Sewers

This is Part 3 of my playthrough of Everquest II. I encourage you to read the previous entries before this one: Part 1 | Part 2

With the Tunarians routed, there isn't all that much more to do on the Isle of Refuge. We finished collecting 5 feathers and 5 sea shells and turned them in to a crazed collector woman for a pair of necklaces. I assume I'm getting ripped off here, but each of the items this woman gave me has more stats than the rest of my gear combined so we will make do.

We helped Bobbie Whirlwidget research submarines. We finished up a research assignment gone wrong for Trainer Sythor the All-Seeing. His poor research assistant was eaten by a large fish. He immediately went to work finding a new one. You have to love when fiction mirrors real life! And then finally we helped a Priestess with a very love/hate relationship with her job.


I spent a decade as a Discipline Priest in another life; I feel you girl.

But with that, sadly, our time with the Isle has come to the end. It was a nice little isle, filled with horrible, incompetent people. Maybe we can do something about that one day. Let's take a visit to our old friend Captain Varlos and get to Freeport.




Freeport Docks

All of our sacrifices and hard work have brought us here.


Alright it's a bit gloomy, but I lived in the US Midwest all my life so I'm used to the permacloud. It's all a bit overwhelming. The guards are surprisingly helpful for an "evil" city. Certainly much nicer than the guards in the real world. Unfortunately, a reality has set in. We are broke. Routing an entire enemy force and conquering an island for our Overlord doesn't pay like it used to.

Unable to find a decent place to stay, we need to figure out where we can at least get shelter. Asking around town gives us some horrible options. But horrible options are apparently the only options we have.


Freeport Sewers




Okay, look. It's definitely a fixer-upper. It smells like raw sewage, looks like raw sewage, and is raw sewage. There are oozes, crabs, snakes, and gnomes living down here. It's not ideal, but it's warm and still cleaner than where I lived back in college.


Sewer crab.

Let's do our best and struggle our way through the night. The denizens all seem weak enough that we don't need to fight most of them. One particularly weak creature, insistently calling herself a ratonga, can apparently talk.



Zatzy claims that she is the victim of a Darkblade death squad. I don't know who the Darkblades are or why they want to kill ratmen, but she claims she can pay me to take the fight to the brigands. They stole a trinket from her and would like it back. I would like the finder's fee so we work out a deal. I probably wasn't going to get much sleep down here anyhow, might as well make ourselves useful.

We saw some shady, murderous types on our way in so let's dispose of them rightly. After killing so many Darkblades that we had to wait for more to show up, we finally find the described trinket on a poor elves' remains. We hike it back to Zatzy.

And...she betrays us. Honestly, we need to stop taking quests from strangers we find in sewers. She attempts to kill us and fails, as we killed her first. She let slip in her hubris that the trinket is really a key to the Darkblade hang out. A hangout might have treasure, or more importantly, a bed to finally sleep in!


But no, there are no beds in the Darkblade Den of Assassins, only assassins. If only it was the Darkblade Den of Decent Nights Sleep! We killed some assassins, and then killed two head honchos: Zaynis and Sinyaz V'rix. What a power couple. They give us the toughest fight we've had yet, and drop the gear to match. Unfortunately, we can't wear any of it. 80% of the gear that has dropped so far has been 'All Fighters, All Priest, All Scouts'. I don't know if this exceptionally bad luck, or exceptionally bad design by the Gods, but it's quite annoying.

Alright, this place sucks. I'm getting out of here. 

Thursday, December 5, 2019

rEverquesting II: Day Two - The Isle of Refuge

rEverquesting II
This is part 2 of our epic journey rerolling a character through Everquest 2. Part 1 can be found here. 

Having apparently blacked out again while the Far Journey docked into the Isle of Refuge, we wake up standing in a field. Immediately, a loud noise followed by a strange voice offers up a quest to talk to someone named Tavil N'Velex. Having been shipwrecked at sea for an unknown number of days, experiencing loss of consciousness, memory loss, and hearing voices in our head, we immediately check ourselves into the closest emergency room.


Just kidding, we see something shiny and immediately pick it up. Then we decided to root around in some shrubs. And then root around in some roots. And animal dens. A bit of ore. And speak of the devil, we meet our woman, Tavil N'Velex. She's going to train me up to be a proper Necromancer (Necromanceress? Neceromancera?).


A couple of notes here. Apparently my character volunteered to sail to an isle in order to pass a citizenship test to gain entry into Freeport. Most citizenship tests involve a lot of paperwork and some test taking. Maybe an oath followed by a lot of picture taking. This one is clearly going to involve a lot of murder.

As evidenced by her now waterlogged scouting party, the penalty for failure on this colony is apparently death. Maybe if they just used a write-up system or some demotions they wouldn't need to train new citizens all the time. Maybe give out some gold stars for good behavior. I don't know. Although, to be fair, the scouts missed what literally hundreds of infinitely respawning Tunarians wandering the Isle. They were really bad at their job.

Anyhow, unimpressed by my victories over the seafaring rodents, we are sent Darg Frostwind, Master of Combat Training, to prove our prowess. We are given a choice between a formidable sparring partner, an average sparring partner, and a weak sparring partner. I have my skelly solo the weak sparring partner because I don't get paid by the hour.

Sucks to suck.

My delegating powers proven, we return to Tayil for our next assignment. She rewards us with a pair of gloves which feels ... reasonable? If I'm going to picking berries and stabbing wood elves you probably do want a pair of gloves. Maybe Freeport is more pragmatic about work-place safety concerns than I thought.

Now we are off to cook lunch. Or at least helping the actual chef to cook lunch. I used to work as a prep chef in college so I'm actually in my element here. Seriously, if you ever need 15 pounds of onions diced I'm your guy. I even have a dagger on me that can double as a decent cooking knife ... and no, apparently we are just murdering bees. Why wouldn't we just ransack their hive for honey? What about a bee is edible? Chef Gorga literally doesn't say what part of the bee we are eating. Do I just bring the whole corpse? I just picked 300 berries, I feel fine skipping lunch.

Nothing says 'delicious tasting stew' like .... bees.
Once our bee slaughter is over, now she wants elk meat. This feels doable. I've had venison before, it's fine. It's a totally normal thing for people to eat. But why does she need this?


She has two giant carcasses right next to her. Why not finish the meat we have here? This stuff goes bad when it's just laying outside. I see no attempts at refrigeration. I don't think this is about cooking at all. I think this is just more bloody murder.

Done with my apparent hazing, we return to Tavil and are sent off to Assassin Vamir. You know what makes a good assassin? Subtlety. You know what's subtle? Telling everyone you're an assassin. Right there in his title. Probably puts it on his business card. Uses it to impress girls at the bar. This is less the Isle of Refuge and more the Island of Misfit Toys. We receive our marching orders and are sent out to assassinate .... bears. This is not assassinating, this is hunting. These people are the worst at their jobs.

Make no mistake, the assassination of Archduke Franz Beardinand began the events we now call World War I.
With the fall of the Wilderbear empire, we move our target to the local hawk population. Again, not an assassination, although we do use bait to bring them into range. So at least we are using something resembling a strategy? It's not necessary, I'm a spellcaster and the hawks are well within range. But this is effort and it's better than we've gotten so far.

As we tidy up from our avian dispatching, we run into another fella, by the name of Charles Arker. This is a high fantasy setting and the dude's name is Charles. Please try to keep up with the aesthetic Charlie. Charley has found an incomplete note containing orders for the Tunarian spies in the area and would like me to kill a few more to piece it altogether. This feels like actual spy stuff. Good work, Chip.

The Tunarian horseriders are formidable, not because of their combat prowess (they die in seconds), but because they apparently have the ability to turn on a dime and ride their horse backwards. Some are able to move quite swiftly despite the horse's legs in no way conforming to the speed they are traveling. One is able to hit me with their weapon despite no movement form their arms whatsoever. Truly magical and fascinating people who all die quickly to a two foot tall skeleton punching them in the horse.

Next we are instructed to kill ... the bears again. The Tunarians are taming the bears and using them to help fight. So we kill the bears? There are almost certainly more bears than Tunarians. Why not kill the Tunarians? My character isn't any smarter than everyone else. I belong here.

Let's get back to Tavil, she'll probably murder us if we don't come running along soon. Now she wants to mess up the Tunarian economy by messing with their mine. Again, if we just kill all the Tunarians or at least drive them off the Isle, we don't need to worry about these things. They weren't turning rock into weapons that fast. This feels like busywork.

Does this even qualify as a mine? This is just shoveling.

We kill some miners and take some ore samples. We're supposed to report to a new guy again, Coercer Zilth. That's a title, but first, let's check in with Charlton. And here it is, the truth comes out. He's got a crush on a local wood elf named Laena. To stop this temptress from seducing him with her feminine wiles, he wants me to kill her. This guy is like the final boss of incels.

So we double back to the bears, to the mine, to the hawks, and she just isn't there. Right when I give up I spot her standing next to some trees. In hindsight this feels exactly where one would fine a wood elf. We murder her, much to the ambivalence of the surrounding elves

We move on to Coercer Zilth who wants us to murder more horseriders. Apparently previous murderings don't count. We need new horses punched in the face. All to create some sort of distraction.


Me in action.

 

Horses punched, and we begin the final assault of the Tunarians. Finally. It's time to actually assassinate the leader! We kill a Captain Tyreth and burn some tents! Fuck yeah! Murder and mild property damage!

But now we have to kill the real leader!

Overseer Adrium in his dreaded ... treehouse. We just have to do the murder this time, although it would make significantly more sense to burn down the permanent structure than some tents. Either way, we finish up the murdering.

But now we have to kill the real leaders!

The Circle of Elders in their dreaded ... cave. We enter the cave and are met with a gauntlet of challengers, including a hawk, a bear, a wolf, and an old man! The old man is level 40, so Tavil comes in and one shots him for me. Literally no reason for me to be involved here. If the training outpost is a bureaucratic waste of time, boy am I sure in a hurry to get to Freeport!

Let's tie up some loose ends. Chucky thanks us for offing his crush, explaining that he is already betrothed, but is new fiance looks like a horse. Killing the elf was clearly the only way to keep these two from just ruining some marital vows.

Charlemagne clearly can't keep the ladies of him.

Yeah this guy must be shooing the women of him. In regards to the Tunarian intelligence, he now wants to meet at a second location to discuss it. Apparently me having routed the Tunarians is unimportant. So this is clearly going to go well.

We meet at "The Nook" which sounds more like a makeout spot than an intelligence drop off point. He explains that he wrote the note to his elf girlfriend, hoping to meet her, but someone else intercepted the note and asked him to investigate it. Except why did the horseriders have copies of the note then? Also it's revealed that I didn't kill Laena, someone else did. Except I did do it. I was there. That literally happened. I pressed the button that lead to her death. I didn't even delegate to my minions. I think we've ran into our first honest-to-goodness bug.

So I guess we're just ignoring that bit? I'm asked to get rid of the evidence by burning it in a very specific firepit. I'm discovered by a field investigator, really more of a private detective, who gives me a quest to question others around the Isle of Refuge about our friend Chuckles's dalliance. Agreeing to go along with this can only potentially implicate me in the fiasco. On the other hand, the investigator is offering a free belt buckle.

I'm a sucker for free swag.

Interviewing a half dozen people leads to the conclusion that no one has heard of the guy. Honestly at this point I'm too tired to care. I collect my Isle of Refuge commemorative belt buckle and call it a day. Tomorrow we'll finish up the side quests on the Isle of Refuge and take our first baby steps into Freeport.

Wednesday, December 4, 2019

rEverquesting II: Day One - The Far Journey

Feeling the hankering for a proper MMO again, I've decided to get back into Everquest 2. Rolling a new character is currently more appealing to me than dusting off my level 100 Wizard. I feel like doing something a little different with this post. I'm doing this bit as a travelogue of my character's adventures. I think this is will not only be fun to write (and hopefully to read), but also enjoyable to look back upon years from now. Also, it might actually help me keep track of some of the story, as it's been fifteen years and I still know fuck all of what's happening in this game.


This time around my character is going to be a necromancer. Mostly because I've never played a Necromancer typed character in any video game other than Diablo 3 (and that one doesn't really count). I also choose to be a Dark Elf. There really are two reasons. I don't know much about fantasy tropes, but I'm to understand Elves are generally dicks. I figure I might as well be the dickiest of the bunch. Secondly, my goal is to play an Evil character so I eventually get to the Commonlands. This is important, because as all gods-fearing Norrathians know, the Commonlands background theme slaps.


It's a damn jaunty tune.

Our intrepid necromancer Aurella begins the game as ... debris. Or at least former debris. Shipwrecked for an unexplained reason after traveling for an unexplained reason, our hero was spotted and rescued by the ship The Far Journey. Either the shipping routes in Norrath are very busy or we are very lucky.

It's not much but it's better than floating.

Our hotbars blessedly only have four abilities on it. This is in contrast to the 2,378 buttons on my Wizard's hotbars. We have a hearthstone, a DoT, a nuke, and the ability to summon a skeleton. Combine this with a skeleton butler cosmetic from /claim and we've got the beginning of a happy evil family.

You could say we are running a ... skeleton crew.

Greeting our savior, the good Captain Varlos, we are immediately put to work. First we help a chap find his hat in some boxes. This is why I always sharpie the contents of boxes when I move house, it really reduces this stress of this sort of thing. We also find a small bag and a threadbare tunic. For some reason we steal these things from the people who just saved our life. Role playing as evil begins quick and early in Everquest II.

Our now hooded chap gives us a commemorative coin for our hard work. I presume these are the same bits and bobs I find being advertised on cable TV late at night. We then immediately sell this charm for next to nothing and buy a piece of the moon. I can't help but thinking bits of the moon should be more valuable. I understand that the moon exploded, and a good deal of it landed on Norrath, but I don't remember huge piles of moon in Antonica or anything. It feels like a shard of Luclin should be worth more than the commemorative coin that was destined to sit in the bottom of a closet forever.

Anyhow, a rat infestation is becoming a problem and Captain Varlos has dispatched our necromancer to do the job. We do not receive traps to do this job. We do not receive some sort of poisonous spray. We don't even get the luxury of some gloves. We get a club. It's time to go whack-a-mole.

The first of God-knows how many things we will be killing during our time in Norrath.

(Tangent: In college our house had a minor mouse problem. I had a few traps set in my bedroom that mostly worked. But one mouse was too smart to be caught. Unfortunately, said mouse had both eaten through the wires in my headphones but also gotten into my food stores. One day, while playing WoW, I heard the tell-tale scamper of the mouse behind me. Frustrated, I did the only thing I could think of, grabbing the broken leg of a table stand that sat next to my desk and took a swing. I got him. I did not gain XP. I just felt incredibly gross.)

Anyhow, after blasting two Mickeys we get attacked by a drakota, which I believe is a dragon going through puberty.


Having been denied access to the car by his father, our pimply dragon sets the bow of the boat on fire and sets a goblin free. It's never explained why a goblin was imprisoned on the front of the ship. Personally, I would be more concerned about a full-grown necromancer than a goblin but sailors are a quirky bunch. The dragon runs off (explaining the we are not it's real dad), the goblin is murdered, and we finish our Far Journey. Onto the Isle of Refuge.

Monday, December 2, 2019

December Goals and Vrooms

My goal at the beginning of the month was to complete 5 games from the Xbox Game Pass for PC. And for the second month in a row I did not actually complete that goal.

But I'm very fine with that. A 5 day trip to San Antonio followed by nearly a week of being on the shelf with the flu shortened my PC gaming availability this month. But even with the extra week and a half I would have failed my goals.

I did complete one game this month: I finished off Outer Worlds. I've already talked about what an enjoyable experience that was, and since this month of Game Pass was a dollar it's pretty difficult to say I didn't get my moneys worth from just that.

I also gave Bloodstained a shot. I like Metroidvanias, but it's an okay game in a genre filled with pretty great ones. I'm glad I was able to give it a try so cheaply. Maybe I'll come back to it one day.

But the main surprise of the month, and the game that at this point has taken up more playing time than anything was ... Formula 1 2018.

I guess we're a motorsports blog now.


A combination of subscribing to cable to watch college football and having nothing else to watch on Sunday mornings reignited my interest for both Formula 1 and motorsports in general. With F1 2018 being available on the Game Pass and it was basically frictionless to give the game a try.

I don't think I've ever mentioned it here on this blog, but I used to be an avid player of racing games. MMOs are certainly the genre I've invested the most hours of my life into, but at one point race 'em ups weren't too far behind. 

But just like everything else in the video game industry, most racing titles moved into a direction that I didn't much care for. Around the mid 2000s, the focus moved to online racing and paid DLC. I don't have a personal issue with racing online, in fact it could be an improvement to the dismal AI these games have had for the past two decades. But developers have refused to put the time and effort into making the online experience enjoyable.

In 2017, the newest Gran Turismo, GT Sport, had just released. I rented a copy to see if it was still my cup of tea and was disappointed to see very little single player content and an extreme focus on the multiplayer eSports leagues. 

Giving it a shot, I joined an online event. First was qualifying, a round of play where everyone attempts to get the fastest single lap around the track to see who gets to start at the beginning of the field. Being experienced, I managed to get first.

And then the race starts, I get a good start, we move down the straight and get to the first corner. I slow my car in the same manner I did during my qualifying lap ... and get spun out by the driver behind me who simply plows through my car. Most of the drivers also take an opportunity to side swipe me. I'm now spun out of the race with no chance to compete.

To add insult to injury, leaving a race early, even when there's no possible point in continuing, damages your online reputation meter: which limits your online ranking and will eventually cause you difficulties queuing up in matches. I pull my car out of the grass, and limp towards the road, when the screen flashes yellow text at me.

"Penalty for collision: 15 seconds"

The game was penalizing me for getting rear ended and spun out by another player. Additionally, that reputation meter I mentioned before? Penalized. I'm a dangerous driver.

Naturally, I popped the disc out of my PS4 and sent that game back. The situation is similarly bad in pretty much every game in the genre.  My exodus from the world of electronic vrooms continued until this month.  Game Pass has both F1 2018 and Forza Horizon 4. Giving both games a try has showed me that developers have started adding some decent single player back into their games. The online problems continue, but its clear developers have learned they need to add some meat to the single player bones to satisfy players like me.

Before I had wrote that I felt subscription services held an important place for me as a content discovery system. That's exactly what happened here and I'm pretty darn happy about it. I purchased the more up to date Formula 1 2019 from the Steam sale and am currently working my way through the career mode. I don't know if this is a brief infatuation or if I'll start investing stupid amounts of money into racing wheel setups, but Game Pass served its purpose for a month. 

Not bad for a dollar.

My goal for the next month is to complete a season of racing in F1 2019 and to settle down and finally pick a decent MMO to play through for a little while. Ultima Online has proven to be a fun curiosity, but I think my time with it is coming to a close (which I'll have more on in a future post). I'll be leaving for a 2 week trip back home for the holidays, so the Switch will probably see more play than the PC. But with EQ2's new expansion and updates from other games I'm still itching to do some grinding.